A Wedding Story
by CarlinJ83
Summary: I thought this be something fun to write about since it's wedding season and all Ii thought I give it a Try;
1. A Proposal Up On the Roof

Author's Note; I know you all must be wondering what's going on here and why the other stories have been taken well I'd thought I rewrite and rename them kind of clean them up; I know it's been awhile since my last post; so the last couple days ago I was thinking about rewriting and so here I am, you might not all understand believe me I don't understand myself loll;

I Do Not own Hey Arnold but if I did Nick would have they're asses sued

A Wedding Story

I thought this be something fun to write about since it's wedding season and all Ii thought I give it a Try;

A Proposal Up On the Roof

Chapter 1

Arnold knew today was the day; he had been waiting for the perfect moment to pop the question to Helga. They had been dating for close to a year now and she had been living with him for almost two months now.

He had already picked out the ring two weeks ago still debating how to propose and now he was excited to finally ask her

planned out, first they were going to dinner at Le Cirque one of New York's most beloved In the car on the way to the stadiums and on the top of the Empire State building is where he would smuggle champagne and that's where the proposal will take place.

He got off work a little early and they would be heading out as soon as Helga got in. She was going to meet him at his loft and then they would make the drive out to the restaurant and the empire state bldg.

Just then the elevator door swung open, pulling him from his thoughts. "Hey." she said coming setting down her keys and purse down before going over to the couch where he was sitting.

"You excited about tonight?" he asked getting up

"Well it seems like you are keeping the tradition alive from French dinner, opera and a rooftop afterwards" she said leaning up to kiss him.

""You better go change so we can get going" he said smacking her butt as she raced from the room laughing.

In the car on the way to the restaurant Arnold couldn't stop talking how it was going to be a special. "We're here." he said climbing out as he took her hand in his. They followed the hostess in through the dining area; Arnold kept a firm grasp on her hand as they pushed through the crowds. When they got to their table and got seated, Arnold turned to look at Helga she had never looked more beautiful to him she was wearing a long strapless white maxi dress with her hair pulled back in a sleek pony tail along with pink gem earrings.

The waiter got both their drinks her a dry martini and him a vodka tonic; the night was going according plan Arnold couldn't wait for the next step where he would get down on one knee and ask the tormentor of both childhood and heart to be his forever. They had gotten the drinks time went by they got they're entrees and shipping on some good French wine imported from Bordeaux, France.

After dinner they strolled through central park and arriving at the empire state building, it was finally the moment Arnold had been waiting for as they got out of the elevator and out on the terrace and looking out at the Hudson river the nice breeze blowing through the two blond haired couple. Just as Helga looked up Arnold pulled out the bottle of champagne bottle with two flutes, at first she was too stunned to reply. "Oh my god Arnold you serious?" she said turning to face him.

"I pulled some strings to get it up here" Arnold said as he was them glasses and toasting to a wonder evening but for the Arnold the night was not over yet "oh it's so beautiful up here but it's even better, because you're here with me Arnold."."". Helga was looking out at the scenery as he had been moments before, a blissful smile on her face, her large eyes set in a dreamy expression of peace

Arnold looked on and there she was smiling in that genuine way, Helga Pataki his childhood arch-nemesis, the girl who always made fun of him, picked on him, tortured him with pranks and called him insulting nicknames, looking back at the times they've been through together from the runaway float, Thanksgiving, science project, the school play and saving the neighborhood and finding his parents, so yeah you can say they've been through a lot together.

"Helga?" a pause ensued, Arnold felt his heart beat a bit faster, blood rising to his face, he had to do this. He loved her dearly; he would do anything to make her happy, he would sacrifice himself instead of letting the love of his life feel any pain at all. Helga I just like to say... I love you. Then Helga looked up at him a totally peaceful look was on her face when her sapphire eyes met his emerald orbs that have always haunted her throughout her childhood

"I've been thinking," Arnold said quietly several minutes as the night was coming to an end "yes?" Helga replied just as softly. He turned to face her directly pulling out he pulled out the ring for her to see It was a beautiful diamond bridal set with engagement that was round cut diamond with two pink diamond with prong set side diamonds s and wedding ring attached Helga felt her pulse begin to quicken as realization sank in, "oh it's beautiful." she said as he pulled it out of the case, he knelt down placing the ring on her figure before sliding it on "Helga G, Pataki you were my first everything my first concern, You were my first kiss, Helga and I'm not poetic like you so I really suck at this please spend the rest of your life with me "" they chuckled. "Marry me, Helga please?"

"What you do think you stupid football head!" as he slid the band onto her finger "so I'll take that as a yes" and then he pulled her in his arms and kissed her on lips so passionately that she broke into tears against his embrace.

a/n reviews please I need to know if it's good or bad.


	2. the engagement

Authors Note: I know I have got a lot of nerve posting another story after I after I haven't completed the others but as I went a long time thinking about it why not do little snippets like short stories! I know it's confusing and I don't even get it myself so you all understand that when it come to stuff like this I attend to loose my train of though so therefore I get really frustrated to where I stop all together but for the last couple weeks and it took me some very needed time to come up with this idea of writing little snippets like giving every character like Gerald, phoebe, Rhonda and Harold etc; So this is a new beginning for all my readers and me. So hope you all like this one to I think you will.

I don't own hey Arnold but if I did I would raise hell to nick!

Other than that on with the story.

A Wedding Story:

The Engagement

For Arnold and Helga the last couple of weeks have been crazy, ever since they got engaged their days were busy with plans for their upcoming nuptials her job as a journalist the New York Times and his job working for MSF (Doctors Without Borders/Medicines Sans Frontiers, MSF recruiting medical, administrative and logistical support personnel to provide medical care to people in crisis in nearly 60 countries w worldwide. Which means constantly traveling every per year; and Helga understood that helping other people was his passion and that's what she love him for.

This is what Helga has been waiting for her whole life and now it was finally happening, she was engaged to the most wonderful man in the entire world, There were lots of decisions to be made—church all she knew she's always wanted to get married in St. Patrick's Cathedral, reception, flowers.

She put Phoebe who is pregnant her second child in so that meant finding a maternity bridesmaid dress with handling the affairs and had not decided on a dress and she wasn't the fashion expert,

So that's where a certain Mrs. Rhonda Wellington Lloyd Alcazar comes in, she was going to fly in on her private jet from L.A. and Phoebe along with her 4 yr. old Vanessa she and Helga's 5 yr. old niece were going to be the flower girls and her 3 yr old nephew Wyatt will be ring bearer.

Phoebe and Vanessa were coming up from Nokesville, Virginia, Gerald was coming too he, Arnold, Miles, Harold who lives outside of Detroit and Eugene lives 30 minutes away while the other guys are all out west, so they were going to hang out and do guy stuff, Stella was going shopping with her daughter in law to be and her friends.

While the five of them were going shopping and have lunch for wedding and of course the whole time Rhonda was bragging about how she's got all the connections with all the famous fashion designers such as Vera Wang, Monique lhuillier, Christian Dior, Armani etc. and going on how her origami was right even though she declined the day after that the thing was a piece of shit, but hey that's princess for you, she is now a mother of four beautiful daughters who are more spoiled rotten, the only problem is Thaddeus yeah at her and Lorenzo's wedding where Helga was a bridesmaid, Thaddeus went sky diving right into the ceremony, and the honeymoon he just happened to book a flight to the same location they were going, and now Thaddeus purchased a house in Bel Air right next door to theirs, Helga told Rhonda he's nothing more than a poor minded twisted little freak.

But in the end with Arnold around to help and support her everything will be alright for so she keeps telling herself that.

A/N: I tried making it long as possible!


	3. the dress

A/N: too me I think the best months to get married in am May and September, April? Lets just say it's a very rainy month but you know that saying April showers bring May Flowers, so I don't know if any you ever watch the we channel my show on there is My Fair Wedding that guy David knows what he's doing so yeah, and I just loved the movie bridesmaids the dress shop scene was hilarious

Disclaimer: I don't own hey Arnold but if I did I would raise hell to Nick!

Chapter 3;

The Dress

It was going to be a beautiful day in New York and a long one at that, Helga was going wedding dress shopping with Stella, Phoebe and Rhonda along with little Vanessa, they all found a day out of their busy schedules to do it, as of now they stood on the busy New York sidewalk and stared at the store in front of them Vera Wang's Bridal house on 991 Madison Ave., New York, NY 10021 at 77th St. she went By appointment only.

They went in they exchanged identical especially Rhonda had looks of glee before simultaneously stepping forward. Helga took a deep breath, "let's go she said and pulled open the front door as they stepped into the plush shop and stood staring in awe at all of the beautiful wedding things. "Oh Helga," her mother-in law to be breathed.

"I know and Big Bob is going flip out" Helga said with a sigh, they we're going to be spending a lot of money out of the Wedding Fund today, "He'll get over it," Stella said she admired Stella for her optimism and kindness just like Arnold, but knowing Big Bob he will have a bitch fest but that wasn't going to let that get to her.

"Can I help you?" A smiling saleslady said as she made her way over to the ladies. "Yes I'm here to look for a wedding dress! "Certainly," the saleslady smiled and motioned for them to follow her. She could smell a big sale and was eager to help "My name is Amelia"

"Helga and this is Phoebe she going be my maid of honor and her daughter Vanessa she's the flower girl, Rhonda she's a bridesmaid I have five more girls but they live far away and my mother in law in to be Stella, my own mother could be here but she and along my sister live out in California" Helga replied.

"When's the big day?" Amelia was all smiles as she led them down a gown filled aisle.

"In June 30th," Helga replied. "Oh, I love June weddings," Amelia stopped at the end of the aisle, "Oh" Helga's eyes had immediately found the gown she was looking for, "oh mom, this is it!" She pulled the dress off the rack and held it out for the others to see

"It's gorgeous! Let's try it on," and Amelia led her back to a plush dressing area complete with floor to ceiling mirrors. Helga stepped inside the dressing room to try on the dress,

As they were going through the maid's dresses; "Just then the door of the dressing room opened and Helga walked out looking radiant. "What do you think?" she asked as she did a slow turn for them. The dress had illusion straps and a draped bodice and a beautiful tiered train with a pink bow around the waist.

"Oh Helga, it's _the_ dress," Phoebe said simply with tears in her eyes. "I know," Helga agreed happily. "I've only tried on 25 dozen others, but when I saw this one online I just knew it was the one.

Amelia stepped forward, "it doesn't look like it will need much altering. You're tall, but the length is still good unless you want to wear heels." Helga shook her head, "I'll be nervous enough, I don't need to add concentrating on not falling on my face in front of everyone I know to my list of worries." They all laughed.

"Well, other than that it doesn't look like it will need to be altered very much. We could take it out in the bust area if you think you'd be more comfortable, but I don't think you need to" Stella replied, she reluctantly changed out of the gown and went to purchase it

When her cell phone rang and she saw that it was Arnold her face broke out into a huge smile.

"Hey, how's the big hunt going?" Arnold's voice was warm and laughing in her ear."Oh, just fine, I found the dress," Vanessa said happily.

"You did? Does that mean you're going to be home soon?" Arnold asked hopefully Helga laughed, "Oh football head, you're such a laughing riot. "What do you mean? He asked.

"Of course I'll be home soon, Helga rolled her eyes she smiled, "I love you."

"I love you, too."

"See you soon."


	4. bridesmaids

A/n: I everyone I'm back thank you all the reviews; I just loved the movie bridesmaids so this is what this chapter based on somewhat based on it, so I'd be fun to write next chapter I'll have something more laughing your ass off I don't know any of you heard that but I certainly did but anyways I'll get on with the story.

Another day and there was lots to do before the wedding as Helga prepares for the biggest day of her life, she had called the girls together to find their bridesmaids dresses keeping in tune with the rest of the wedding party.

Helga had chosen to make this search a virtual one and conduct it in before venturing out into bridal shops, Helga Pataki left her apartment on time, as always. She was never late. And she prided herself on being efficient and hard working. Sometimes it seemed to others that Rose led no life outside her admirable career as a journalist for the New York Times; hoping one day become editor in chief.

Naturally, she had done well in her career. Unfortunately, that left little else for Helga Pataki. But, she was the hardest worker that she had ever met; it had even earned her that was how Helga managed to squeeze in an unbalanced social life.

Helga, Phoebe, Rhonda and Patty who drove down from Detroit; all met up at the Bridal Shoppe to find the Perfect dress for her bridesmaids.

Helga looking through the dresses ranging from size 0 to size 18; Assistant walks up to Helga. "Can I help you ma'am?" "Well I am looking for the perfect dress for my bridesmaids and Phoebe here is pregnant so were going to need a maternity dress and Patty is a misses" Helga tells the assistant.

As the assistant walks away from Helga to get a few dresses in their sizes, the assistant comes back with 8 dresses on her arms. Hanging them on a nearby rack. Sara looks through them and finds a few she likes.

Helga looks through them and finds one for the girls. She hands them the dresses and then both three take their dress to the dressing room and try them on, they Walked out the dressing room in a cocktail length wearing a frilly pink bridesmaid dresses.

Ok guys, lets see what the others look like first." says Helga to her friends. She walks back into the dressing room and tries on the rest. They didn't fit well and didn't like how they looked. She decided on the first dresses,

Ok guys, lets see what the others look like first." says Helga to her friends. She walks back into the dressing room and tries on the rest. They didn't fit well and didn't like how they looked. She decided on the first dresses.

Walking out of the Bridal Shoppe they decide to go over to a cafe and get something to eat. They all ordered their food. Too which they all got food poisoning and it was not a pretty sight.

Helga paced back and forth a few times, waiting for her friends to come out of the restroom holding their stomachs, at 4 o'clock and ended up waiting an extra fifteen minutes she got back to the apartment too see Arnold who smiled and stood and planted a kiss on her,


	5. bachelorette party

**A/N: to any of you whose ever experienced a bachelor or bachelorette party; from hired entertainment to a mans object they can get pretty racy that's how I'll put it.**** Events in the night of Helga's bachelorette party…gets rather porn at the end, but Helga+Tequila+Arnold= SEX. In this story,**

Bachelorette Party:

"There is no way in hell I am NOT wearing that," Helga said as she peered at the plastic, glitter-smothered tiara with a veil draped down the back. The words "Bride to be" flashed brightly in the colors of blue, pink, and purple. Helga crossed her arms and shook her head furiously back and forth like a three year old.

Rhonda grabbed the tiara from the coffee table. "You have to wear it, Helga, it's your bachelorette party. It's tradition."

Helga stared at her. "Rhonda" she said slowly, "I'm already wearing the t-shirt you…uh…created for the evening. Do I have to wear the tiara, too?

Helga pulled at the white t-shirt she was wearing which had fifty multi-flavored lifesavers attached to it that said 'suck for a buck**'**. "I'm not wearing both crimiany." Phoebe sighed in frustration.

"Helga, you are the most not fun almost bride that I've ever met. It's seven bridesmaids against one bride and I grew up in a trailer park so I think I can take your scrawny ass. Put the tiara on NOW!" she yelled as Helga grabbed the tiara quickly and secured it on top of her head.

Phoebes smiled and sighed, "That was easy enough, you ready to go?"

Helga sighed and nodded as she followed Phoebe and Rhonda into the kitchen where Nadine who flew from Denver, Sheena flew and from Phoenix where Lila flew in from Chicago, Olga and Patty were waiting. All seven looked up with amused expressions when they saw Helga in the flashing headpiece and lifesaver shirt. "Rhonda, how'd you get those lifesavers to stick?" Patty asked curiously.

"I mixed up some of that icing that you use to build gingerbread houses with. That stuff is like cement."

Meredith sighed in frustration, crossing her arms over her chest.

"Okay," Rhonda started, clapping her hands loudly. "We're going to 200 Orchard. We can't have anyone drinking and driving. I've called the cab and I have my camera…." Rhonda stopped to look for her purse, noticing it on the counter. They heard the sound of a car honking outside. "Limos here, everyone ready?"

Everyone nodded and followed Rhonda as she maneuvered Helga out the door and into the cab.

There's a DJ?" Helga exclaimed as she and the group walked into the bar a half hour later. A few people were in the corner of the bar, setting up speakers and disco lights, preparing to start playing music.

Jeff the Bartender looked up as the girls made their way to the bar to order drinks. Jeff automatically grabbed a shot glass from behind the bar and filled it with tequila for Helga. "Consider this on the house. This and the band," Jeff smiled.

"You hired the band for me?" Helga exclaimed.

"Well, not just for you, but Rhonda told us you'd be hanging here tonight and I made sure I had the appropriate entertainment to meet your needs. Besides, this DJ draws quite the crowd." He motioned to the door, where people were entering in groups.

"We should get a table before it's fills up," Patty announced. All the girls but Nadine, Sheena and Lila moved to a corner booth with their drinks. Rhonda leaned into Jeff, "we'll need five shots of tequila at the table except for the maternity lady." Jeff nodded in understanding as Rhonda smirked at him and went to meet her friends.

Rhonda flopped into the booth beside Helga and put her arm around her. "Okay, the first game of the night is "Drink or Dare". All but Helga laughed loudly at the title of the game

"Drink or Dare?" Helga asked softly, dreading what the rules of the game were.

"Yes, Drink or Dare. Each of us will come up with a dare for you to complete and you can either do it, or if you decline you need to take a shot of tequila."

As if right on cue, Jeff brought a tray of five shots of tequila to the table. "Enjoy!" he announced, walking away.

"It's almost like truth or dare," Rhonda continued, "but alcohol is the truth, and the difference is that you get to hear the dare first before deciding if you want to take the dare or drink."

"You have got to be kidding me!" Helga exclaimed, covering her eyes at the thought. She knew that her friends would not go easy on her.

"I kid you not, this is your night, Helga, your last time out as a single woman. I'll go first!" Rhonda rubbed her hands together excitedly. "Drink or Dare. Helga I dare you to go over to that guy," Rhonda pointed at a middle aged bald man sitting a few booths away, "and tell him to 'suck for a buck'," Rhonda motioned to her t-shirt. The girls at the table whistled and laughed at Rhonda's request.

Helga sighed all seven girls chanted in unison "Dare! Dare! Dare! Dare!" She shot them both an evil glare. "Drink," she decided, grabbing a shot glass full of tequila, tilting her head back and swallowing the liquid quickly. She winced as she felt it burn down her throat. The table booed at her choice.

"My turn!" Lila yelled. "Drink or Dare. Helga, I dare you to stand up in this booth and yell at the top of your lungs your name, that you're getting married and you think it's the biggest mistake of your life." The table erupted in giggles as Helga looked at her person, mortified. She could take another drink, but she already felt buzzed after two shots and didn't want to get too wasted. Helga sighed and stood up, holding onto Phoebe's shoulder to balance her.

"Excuse me!" Helga said in loud voice, but not loud enough to get the bar's attention. "Excuse me!" She said again at the same level.

Patty rolled her eyes, stood up and cupped her hands around her mouth. "PEOPLE! CAN WE HAVE YOUR ATTENTION!"? The bar became suddenly quiet and everyone looked over in Patty's direction. "This bride to be has something she needs to tell us," Patty's said loudly, pointing at Meredith.

"Um, hi…my name is Helga. I am getting married in 10 days and I think I'm making the biggest mistake of my life!" Helga looked around at the people in the bar, who all looked back at her with confused expressions. Helga flopped back into her seat while the girls at the table howled laughing. She heard Patty yell, "Thank you," and sat down beside her.

Just then, the DJ's voice boomed over the microphone. "Good evening everyone and thanks for coming out to Joe's bar tonight. We all now know that it's Helga's bachelorette party tonight." Meredith groaned at the attention, but Nadine, Sheena, Olga, Lila, Phoebe and Patty all applauded loudly and the crowd joined them, applauding and cheering as well. "Helga has one request for the men here tonight," the DJ continued. "Her request is "You suck for a Buck". She's wearing a t-shirt full of yummy lifesavers and at some point this fine evening, give her a buck and she'll let you suck!" Catcalls and whistles came from the men in the bar as the DJ played "So What" by Pink. Several people started to get up and dance.

"My turn!" Patty yelled over the music. "Drink or Dare. Helga, I dare you to go over there and dance with that guy." She pointed at a man in coke bottle glasses shuffling to the music. Helga glared at Patty, but motioned for Phoebe to let her out of the booth. She made her way across the dance floor, but was stopped by a guy in a flannel shirt and facial hair. "Excuse me? Meredith, right? I would like to suck, please," he said handing her a dollar. He leaned into the collar of her shirt and grabbed a green lifesaver with his teeth, pulling it off. He stood back up and smiled at her. "The name's Greg and it was nice to suck you." He put his hand out for Helga to shake.

Helga giggled and shook his hand. "Thanks, Greg." She turned to the guy beside Greg. "You want to suck for a buck?" The guy smiled brightly, "I thought you'd never ask," he replied as he reached into his pocket and pulled out a dollar. He leaned in, a little more daring than his friend, and grabbed the red lifesaver closer to her breast. "Thanks for the suck," she whispered, grabbing the dollar bill from his hand. "My pleasure," he replied.

Helga giggled at him and made her way to the man in the coke bottle glasses.

"Excuse me, sir, but would you like to dance with me?" she asked him. The guy looked at her through his glasses, his eyes magnified five times their actual size. He nodded as he continued to shuffle to the music as Helga started to move. She glanced over at the table where her friends were watching her in amusement. She shimmied up next to him, grinding into him with her pelvis as she heard cheering and yelling coming from her friends. She decided at that moment that she was going to have a blast at her bachelorette party.

"Helga, that was hilarious!" Nadine exclaimed. "Now it's my turn. Drink or Dare. Helga, I dare you to take your bra off and fling it at the cute blonde guy at the next table." Helga turned to peer over the back of their seat to the blonde man that Nadine was referring to, who happened to be hanging all over the cute blonde girl beside him.

Helga turned to look at her. "You're kidding, right? How do you think that would go over with his girlfriend who is hanging all over him? No way! I'll start a bar fight!"

Rhonda picked up a full shot glass. "Then you drink," she stated handing the glass to Helga. Helga sighed and tilted her head back, allowing the liquid to burn down her throat.

"My lips are numb," Helga said suddenly, patting her lips with her hand and she started to giggle. "What's next, Rhonda-luscious?"

Rhonda laughed. "Next, we are going to play a freaking awesome game called 'Hot Willy", which is like hot potato, only we toss around a penis." All the girls looked at Rhonda like she had gone crazy. "What?" she asked.

"Umm, Rhonda, I'm pretty sure that all the penises in this room are attached to men," Nadine said.

"Duh, I know that," Rhonda fished through her oversized purse and pulled out a pink, plastic penis that had a face on the tip. "Meet Hot Willy. We toss Willy around and he vibrates and shakes. Whoever is holding him when he vibrates is out and has to take a shot." she explained.

The girls looked at each other, speechless. Patty finally spoke up, "Where the hell did you get that?"

"Online," Rhonda replied. "I Googled 'bachelorette party games' and found this. I had to buy it." Rhonda giggled at the pink penis she was holding. "We can't do it at the table, so we'll need to go to a corner of the bar where we can toss it." She looked around and spotted a deserted corner. "Let's go over there!"

The girls followed Rhonda to the corner and made a circle. Jeff came up to the group with another tray of five shots, looking at the pink penis in amusement. Rhonda wound up Hot Willy and gave him to Helga who was standing to her right. Helga gave him to Lila, who gave him to Patty, who gave him to Phoebe who gave him to Olga who gave him to Sheena and back to Rhonda. Rhonda shrieked when she felt Hot Willy begin to vibrate in her hands.

"You're so out!" Helga yelled, taking Willy from her. Rhonda went over to the tray and picked up the glass, drinking the shot quickly. Meredith wound Willy back up and handed him off to Nadine, Nadine to Sheena, and Sheena to Lila and Lila to Olga to Phoebe when Willy vibrated again.

"Out! Out! Out!" Helga chanted, holding her hand out for Phoebe to give her the penis. Phoebe raised her eyebrows, "I've never seen you this excited over a penis," she joked, handing Willy to Helga. The game continued, and Nadine was the only one left with Willy. She jumped up and down yelling, "I got the penis! I got the penis!" causing several people in the bar to stare over to the corner at them. After a few more games of "Hot Willy" and several shots of tequila later, the girls went back to their booth, giggling.

"Excuse me," a voice interrupted their laughter. Helga looked up to see two men standing a their table, looking at her. "My name is Brett and this is Matt and we'd both like to suck."

Helga giggled as she climbed out of the booth, staggering slightly as she regained her balance. Brett handed her a dollar and bent down to the green lifesaver at her belly button. Helga turned to Matt, who hesitated, "where on your shirt is off limits?" he asked her.

"Ohm, look, a gentleman," Phoebe commented, sipping her beer.

Helga giggled loudly and pointed to the pineapple lifesaver directly over her nipple. "I am saving this one for my f-fiance because he likes p-pineapple and he's good, no g-garret, in bed. In order for me to have s-sex tonight, I need to keep this lifesaver r-right h-here," she slurred. The girls

"In that case, I'll take this one," he said leaning into her other breast and grabbing the red lifesaver with his teeth.

"T-Thanks for unnerstandin," Helga slurred as she flopped back into the booth.

Suddenly, all of the girls gasped as they heard the DJ start to play, "Girls Just Wanna Have Fun," by Cyndi Lauper. "It's the song! The song of the night!" Rhonda exclaimed, pulling Helga onto the dance floor. Phoebe, Nadine, Sheena, Lila, Patty and Olga followed to dance as well. After five shots of tequila, Helga was feeling pretty good. She danced and laughed and got several offers to "suck for a buck" and somehow managed to protect her pineapple 'get laid' lifesaver, but the rest of the candy slowly disappeared as the night progressed.

All eight girls collapsed into the booth after a few hours of dancing. Rhonda looked at her watch, "It's a little after two. Javier will be here to pick us up soon." All the girls groaned at Rhonda statement, not wanting their night to end.

They heard the bell to the door of the bar jingle and Javier walked in. "Javier!" the girls yelled loudly. Alex looked in their direction, smiled and came over to the table. Helga hopped out of the booth and lost her balance, Javier grabbing her arms to steady her. "Helga, what the hell are you wearing? Are those lifesavers stuck to your shirt? Nice tiara, by the way."

Helga giggled and hiccupped. "Yep, heyyyy Javier, you wanna suck fer a b-buck?" she giggled again. "You cannnn't suck thish one here," she slurred, pointing to the pineapple lifesaver over her nipple. "That onesh for Arnold cause," she lowered her voice to a strained, loud whisper, "cause I need layered, I meannn laidered." She became frustrated, as the words wouldn't come out right. "I need shex!" she yelled loudly, drawing attention to her by the remaining customers in the bar.

Javier smirked. "Well, that leaves one lifesaver then, Helga." he pointed to the lifesaver in the middle of her chest. He fished in his jeans pocket and pulled out a dollar. He handed it to her and leaned into her, pausing for a dramatic moment to pull off the remaining available lifesaver. Helga giggled. He pulled back to look at all the colorful stains on her shirt. "How much money did you make?" He asked her, moving the lifesaver around in his mouth.

"Ohhhhhh," she rubbed her nose for a moment. "Prolly like fit…fit…lotta money, Javier."

Javier laughed. "Okay, Miss Money Bags, your chariot awaits for you and your posse outside," he said, putting an arm around Helga to support her and followed Rhonda, Phoebe, Nadine, Sheena, Lila, Patty and Olga out the door.

Arnold heard Helga stumble and run into the stand in the hallway. "Stupid mother fucker!" he heard her yell. He snickered to himself knowing that she had to be plastered to talk like that. He looked up from the book he was reading and watched her stagger into their bedroom and sway at the foot of the bed. He looked curiously at her attire, her tiara flashing and her multi-colored stained t-shirt with a lifesaver stuck to her boob.

"Hey," she started, "Did you move that freaking stand in the hallway? Cause it wasn't there when I left…I think." She ripped the tiara from her head and tossed it in the corner of the bedroom.

Arnold laughed. "Sorry, Helga, the stand hasn't moved. It looks like you had a fun night, though. Can I ask what's all over your shirt?"

Helga thought for a moment. "What shirt?" she asked.

"What?" Arnold said loudly, his smile fading quickly as he sat up straighter. Helga flopped down on her stomach onto the bed. "What the hell did you just say?" he asked again.

"Rhonda glued lifesavers all over my shirt and guys paid me a dollar to suck one off with their mouths," she said with her eyes closed.

"Uh huh," Arnold nodded his head, jealousy flowing through is veins. Helga got up suddenly and looked at him. "I made money," she said as she reached into all the pockets of her jeans and threw several one-dollar bills onto her nightstand. Arnold looked at the money, speechless.

She flopped back down on the bed and reached for him to come closer to her. "I saved one for you," she said softly, showing him the lonely pineapple flavored lifesaver stuck to her shirt. "Your favorite flavor on your favorite spot," she teased him. She pulled his face closer to hers and kissed him passionately, slipping her tongue into his mouth. She broke off the kiss and stared at him with hooded eyes. "You want to suck for a buck?" she asked him seductively, moving to straddle him on the bed. Arnold looked at her with amused eyes that slowly fell to the lifesaver on her breast. "Or, better yet, do you want to suck for a fuck?" Helga

Helga leaned in to trail kisses along the side of his neck. She nipped, licked, and kissed her way up to his earlobe, nibbling at it gently. She pulled back to lift her shirt over her head as Arnold reached behind her to unhook her bra and throw it to the ground. He reached up to cup both of her breasts, putting his mouth around her nipple and sucking lightly.

Helga groaned in pleasure. "I want you, Arnold," she whispered huskily. "I want you to fuck me senseless, make me scream your name. I've waited all night for you to be inside of me, pounding me so hard I forget my name," Arnold looked up at her and pulled her face down to his to kiss her. The kiss went from passionate to fierce quickly as Arnold grabbed Helga under her thighs, hoisting her from his lap and flopping her on her back. He pulled his shirt over his head, tossing it to the floor. Helga reached up to run her hands over his chest hair as he lay on top of her, devouring her neck and collarbone. He trailed kisses down her breasts and stomach, stopping to unbutton her jeans and yank them off of her. He pulled off her panties and threw them to the ground, leaving her completely naked, silently pleading with him to continue. He scanned her body. "You are beautiful," he said as he caressed her with his hand. Helga moaned impatiently as his hand trailed down her smooth legs.

"Arnold, today!" she hissed at him. Arnold smiled at her impatience, but he liked it when she was bossy. It turned him on. He moved his hand in between her legs and found her clit. He began rubbing circles on it gently with his thumb as he placed two fingers inside of her, curling them up and finding her g-spot. He listened to her moans intensify as he slowly picked up his pace, putting slightly more pressure on her clit.

Burst out laughing at her joke. Arnold laughed with her, amused with his drunken fiancée. It was going to be a long night with her.

"Ohhh, Arnold, ohh, yes, yes! Arnold!" she cried out as she felt an orgasm start. Arnold watched her in fascination as an orgasm took over her body. It was almost too much for him to handle. Arnold pulled his hand away from her center, and replaced it with his mouth, licking and sucking at her folds, tasting her juices from her orgasm. His tongue danced around her clit, and he could hear her start moaning again. He continued at the same pace until he could taste her coming again. Her moans were music to his ears, she was intoxicating. He stopped, as she lay motionless, completely spent from back to back orgasms. She looked down at him and watched him stand up to remove his sleep pants and boxers, his erection thick and ready.

Helga sat up and scooted to the edge of the bed where he stood. She placed both of her hands on his butt and took him into her mouth, sucking hard at the tip of his cock for a moment, causing him to groan. He ran his fingers through her hair and held on to her head to direct her. He watched her move her mouth around him, moving at various speeds and sucking at different intensities. His groans got louder the closer he came to spilling "Helgs," he croaked at her. "Soon, soon," he managed to say. Helga looked up at him hungrily and when the tip of his cock hit the back of her throat the third time, he felt himself release inside her mouth. She continued to suck him until he stopped pulsating becoming soft. She looked up at him and grinned, "I needed a little salt with my tequila," she joked, winking at him.

Arnold pushed her back on the bed and lay on top of her, kissing her neck, chest and breast in order for his erection to develop again. Meredith ran her hands down his back and to his ass. "I love you," she whispered in his ear.

"Hmm, love you, too," Arnold replied, becoming aroused again. He spread her legs apart with his and she hooked her legs around him. He entered her swiftly and filled her to the core, listening to her cry out in pleasure. He thrust into her a few times, realizing that he would need a different angle to get the results he wanted out of her. He pulled out of her and motioned for her to roll over onto her knees. She obliged his request and he entered her from behind, causing her to start moaning immediately. He placed his hands on the front of her thighs and used them as leverage to enter her with more force. He felt Helga walls clamp down around him as another orgasm overtook her body, causing her to cry out in pleasure. Derek increased his speed as she came, knowing that once her orgasm was done, she would have one immediately after that.

"Arnold! " she cried, feeling another orgasm starting. "Oh, God! You are fucking amazing! Fuck!" she gasped, moaning uncontrollably as an orgasm consumed her body again. Arnold listened to her come and felt her walls clamp down on him again, causing him to spill into her. They both stayed still for a moment, allowing their breathing to slow down and their heart rates to become regular again. Arnold removed himself from her and put his arm around her, guiding her to the pillows at the top of the bed. They flopped on the bed, exhausted. Arnold leaned over Helga to grab the comforter off the floor to cover their naked bodies. Arnold settled and pulled her to him, molding his body to hers. "I love you, Helga," he whispered in her ear.

"Mmmm, love you, too." she said sleepily. "I'm so happy I'm going to be your wife."

Arnold smiled. "hmm, me too, and I can't wait to be your husband." He ran his palm up and down the length of her body. "I think you owe me more than one pineapple lifesaver," he whispered in her ear and he was met with soft snores. He sighed and nuzzled his face into her neck


	6. bachelor party

A/N Thank you all who read and reviewed I always look forward to ready all your comments especially Neptune's since you're the one who requested Arnold's bachelor party since planning is still in process so um again thank you all! Ox

Disclaimer: I don't hey Arnold1

Arnold looked around the room as he let a puff of cigar smoke out of his mouth. They'd all come over tonight Arnold leaned back in the chair, listening to the music Harold brought with him.

Had it been 10 years earlier and Arnold was getting married, the apartment would be trashed and the music would be blaring. Then again, if it had been five years earlier, there was no way Lee would have been getting married anyway. As he opened his eyes and surveyed the room again, the image he saw portrayed just how much his life had changed.

Sid and Stinky were across the room on the floor, playing poker with Dean Olga's husband and Harold's son Jeremy had tried his first beer, and turned about as green as the bottle of Heineken itself. All the guys got a good laugh out of it. Scott and Joey Stinky's sons sat on the couch from Arnold, It had been a really pleasant evening; one Arnold would never forget.

Arnold was just lounging around the apartment before going out when Gerald showed up at the front door with cigars, beer and records."

You didn't think we'd let you get married without a proper sending off?" his old friend smiled and then waved his hand to the others, who were waiting down the hallway. Arnold saw Sid first, followed by Stinky. The biggest surprise was to se

"Mom said we should come along and hang out," Jeremy smiled, slapping Arnold a five as he entered the apartment. "If you need anything from the store, let me know and I'll take your car."

Arnold shook his head as the guys made themselves at home in his living room. Harold handed beers to everyone and a fight ensued over Jeremy having one.

"Last time I checked the legal age was twenty-one, Jeremy," Harold said. "You're barely fifteen. And you never know, Arnold might need something from the store. "You can't drive if you've been drinking, bud. What do you think, Arnold?"

Arnold was startled. He'd been living in with Helga for a few months now, and he and the boys had adjusted to each other well. But he hadn't really done any decision-making. Now Harold was

Asking his opinion.

"Oh, I don't know, Harold. I guess I was about fifteen when I had my first beer," Sid shrugged. "And I hated it," he added. "It's an acquired taste, Chief."

"Aw, come on, Dad!" Jeremy kept at it, knowing Harold would cave

All right, but do not tell your mother," Harold said, handing him the bottle. Gerald rolled his eyes as Sid tried in vain to get the cap off the bottle. When Sid finally opened it for him, Jeremy took a big gulp. All the color drained from his face as he swallowed.

"I think you're right, Sid. It must be an acquired taste," Jeremy said quietly, carefully sitting down in a chair. The men roared with laughter and Jeremy innocently handed the bottle to his father and went into the kitchen for a soda.

Arnold smiled. Jeremy went into his kitchen for a soda. Change was evident everywhere. The first time the boys were in the apartment they were very careful not to touch anything. Now Arnold was acting just like he lived there. And the fact that Arnold actually had soda in the apartment spoke for itself. The boys had changed him a great deal.

The men sat and talked for a while, just enjoying each other's company. After a while, Gerald cleared his throat and stood up.

"I guess as the best man I get the honor of making fun of Arnold,"

"Oh, no Gerald. Don't tell the Munich story, please. I'll pay you!" Lee pleaded in mock horror.

"Oh, I'll get to that, don't you worry. I guess we were about twenty-two years old, fresh out of we went to frat party at NYU, the only college that didn't kick him out," Gerald grinned. "He'd just been recruited into training, and I'd just completed his eighth year in the field. I'd received notice that morning I was going to be out of the field for a while to help teach a candidate class. I was just coming off a big case, and it was the last thing I wanted to hear. I didn't think things could get any worse. And then Arnold walked into the building," Gerald continued, pausing as the room erupted with laughter. "He might as well have had 'ladies' man' tattooed across his forehead. He had the typical longish hair and the most god-awful sideburns I'd ever seen. Anyway, he strolled into the building in his three-piece suit and expected the whole building to come to a halt. I took one look at him and knew it was going to be a long agent candidacy. Do you remember the first thing you ever said to me, Arnold?" Gerald smiled.

"Something to the effect of 'my brother! What's happening?'" Lee mumbled.

"He raised his fist into the air and said 'What's happening' my broth'?' as soon as I walked into the lobby to meet him. I rolled my eyes impatiently and shoved the appropriate paperwork into his arms, telling him if he had questions to ask someone for Fuzzy Slippers. I left him there in the lobby. He didn't know what hit him," Gerald chuckled. "Anyway, Arnolds candidate class was supposed to be the biggest one in Agency history. We had a bunch of military guys coming in, supposedly. By the time Arnold had finished all his paperwork, in triplicate, no one had shown. We pulled files and revoked recruitments, and Arnold as just as alone in his class as he was when he walked in the front door. He really didn't have much classroom experience. He did all the reading, ten times over. He knows handbooks inside and out, better than I ever did. But Arnold got most of his training in the field. He went along on assignment with me quite a bit, since they threw me back into the field. Arnold saved my life several times before he even became a full-fledged agent," Gerald paused, looking down at Arnold.

"Well, you've saved mine a few times too, Gerald," Arnold smiled.

"Anyway. After Arnold got his agent security clearance and his PhD, they sent the pair of us over to Munich for a light assignment. It had been a while since Arnold had had the time to get out and party, and he made up for it in Munich. We were meeting a contact of mine in the beer garden one night, and Arnold had somewhere in the neighborhood of nine or ten beers. I don't know what brought it on, but as we were getting up to leave-"

"Oh, come on, Gerald. The boys don't want to hear this!"

"Oh yeah we do!" Sid and Stinky smiled.

"Well, as we were getting up to leave, Arnold got very pale and sat back down. I thought he'd be all right if I could just get him back to the hotel, but Lee wanted to shake hands and say goodbye to my contact. He got his bearings and stood up again, shook hands with my contact..."

"Gerald!"

"And threw up all over his shoes," Gerald finished triumphantly. The boys howled and leaned back in their chairs, and the men shook their heads in amusement.

Arnold shook his head and looked up at.

"Thanks a lot, Fuzzy Slippers," he smiled.

"Arnold, you've been the best agent in my section since I took over the unit. You've changed so much for the better in the past four years, and I couldn't be more proud of you. I couldn't wish anything better for my best friend," Gerald smiled, and picked up his beer. "To you and Helga. May you be as happy in fifty years as you are right now," he smiled, and the rest of the men mumbled their agreement. The boys smiled at each other and tipped back their bottles of cream soda.

Gerald sat back down and the room was quiet for a little while. The boys looked at each other and Stinky nodded at them. Scott and Joey stood up and took a spot on each side of Arnold.

"Arnold, you have become a big part of our lives over the past couple years," Scott began. Arnold shifted uncomfortably in his chair, glancing over at Harold. The two men smiled at each other and looked back up at the boys. "You've made our mother so happy Arnold. And you've made us happy, too. You've really become a great friend to both of us. We can count on you for anything and everything, and you know you can count us for the same. We know you've been part of our family for a long time, but since everything becomes 'official' tomorrow, we thought we'd 'officially' let you know how much you mean to us," Jeremy smiled.

"We love you, Arnold," Stinky said quietly, and handed him two packages and an envelope. Arnold bit his lower lip and ran his hand through his hair, trying to keep his emotions under control. He took the packages from Stinky and sat them in his lap.

"Aren't you going to open them, Arnold?" Harold smiled. Arnold nodded and opened the envelope first. It was from Harold and Patty, wishing them all the happiness in the world. There were also four tickets to a musical at the Kennedy Center enclosed.

"Thank you, Harold," Arnold said. He looked up at Jeremy, who was smiling.

"The first package is from me," he said. Arnold opened the package to reveal a frame, holding a picture of him and the boys washing Helga's Wagoner. They were all soaked to the skin, and grinning from ear to ear. "Grandma took that while we weren't paying attention I guess," Jeremy smiled. "She thought you'd like to have it."

"This is great, Jeremy," Arnold said, having difficulty keeping his voice from trembling. Arnold reached for the other package and opened it to reveal a similar-looking frame holding a different picture. Arnold couldn't contain the sheer joy he felt at seeing the picture. He laughed out loud and smiled up at Stinky.

"That one's from me," said, obviously nervous. "I took it one afternoon after Jeremy's baseball game last spring I think," the boy smiled.

The picture was taken on the middle school playground. Arnold was pushing Helga on the swing, and they were both laughing hysterically.

"We thought you could put these in your office," Jeremy chimed in.

"These are great, fells. Thank you so much, for everything," Arnold said, standing to embrace his stepsons. "I love you both, very much," he said, much softer, as if he wanted only the boys to hear.

Arnold glanced over at Scott, Joey and Jeremy now, sitting on the floor, horsing around with their fathers. Arnold was leaving to go back to Africa in a week, and Arnold was nervous how he's going to be gone for most of the time but Helga knows how important his job is and how helping people is his passion,

The rest of the evening was spent listening to jazz, with Billy giving him the occasional marriage pointers. Sid gushed over how lucky Lee was, to be marrying his true love. Eugene wholeheartedly agreed with the antiquarian. The guys spent a few minutes talking about the wedding, and the rest of the evening was spent pleasantly, just enjoying each other's company and smoking cigars.

As the group got up to leave for the Subway station, Arnold thanked all of them for his surprise bachelor party, tame as it was. The boys shook his hand, as did Harold, and Gerald caught him in a hug as they exited the apartment.

Arnold grabbed the empty beer bottles and the ashtray and dumped them all in the garbage can. He came back into the living room and picked up the picture Stinky took of Helga and Arnold on the playground. He grinned as he lay down onto the couch, gazing at his beautiful wife. As he drifted off to sleep, he hugged the picture against him and talked quietly to no one in the room.

"Thank you, whoever and wherever you are, for bringing this woman into my life. I'm the luckiest man alive," Arnold smiled. The last thing he saw was Helga's smiling face before he fell asleep.


	7. bridezilla

A/N: to any of you who aren't familiar with the word or show here's the definition (_usually humorous_) A woman who, in the course of planning her wedding, exercises or attempts to exercise a high degree of control over all or many minor details of the ceremony and reception, can't talk to her can't kill her!

**1995**, _The Boston Globe_:

She also cautions brides-to-be about turning into **bridezilla**, the name wedding consultants bestow on brides who are particularly difficult and obnoxious.

**2002**, Steffi Kammerer, "Drama, chaos, greed and a white dress," _The Dallas Morning News_ (August 27):

The tricky thing about **bridezillas** is that their transition from sweethearts to creatures from hell cannot be foreseen, not even by the future husbands.

So therefore who wouldn't make a great bridezilla than our own Helga right? But you try having Big Bob bitching about the finances and worrying about Miriam falling down drunk and Olga the biggest pain in the ass! So I hope you all like this one, besides your probably all wondering what come of Helga's Family.

Chapter 7

For Helga the last couple weeks have been nothing but chaos, prepping every single last detail for the wedding preparations which was only a week away, and everything was going right on schedule and it was all going according to plan.

Helga never realized how much work planning a was not easy, and Arnold couldn't be more supportive going along with every decisions she's made, everything had to be perfect for they're special day.

Arnold was already at his childhood home feverishly helping his Grandparents prepare the meal, begging his Grandmother to be relatively normal for just one nightand cringing with each time she referred to him as Kimba. He was so engrossed in the goings on of the busy kitchen that he didn't hear the knocking at the front door and one of the boarders utter a greeting containing his fiancée's name. He was only made aware of her presence when he suddenly felt a pair of slender arms snake around his neck and heard the whisper of a familiar voice in his ear saying "Evening Blondie!" He turned in her embrace to face her, grinning goofily.

Arnold laughed at his ladylove and leaned in to capture her lips, which had been tempting him since she waltzed in the door, in a gentle kiss. As always during these expressions of love for each other they forget where they are and that they are not the only two people on earth and as usual they were interrupted.

Grandpa laughed even more, 25 years old and they're reactions had never changed since they were just teens. He looked at his young grandson warmly and thought about how fast the years had gone by, his Shortman was getting married, wow! More than anything else it made him feel old.

"Oh you know I'm only ribbing you, Arnold! Now enough canoodling and more helping!" He winked as he left to set the table.

The couple rolled their eyes simultaneously, it wasn't their fault they found each other irresistible, it was one of the many benefits of being in love. Arnold turned to get a proper look at Helga; she was dressed in a very pretty peach coloured blouse and matching skirt that hung floatily just above her knees. Suddenly thoughts about preparing dinner shot out of his head, he had other things in mind now and Helga immediately detected them through the wicked glint in his deep green eyes. Her blue ones widened and she slapped him playfully on the arm in mock horror! "You're wicked!" She scolded.

"Can you blame me?" He chuckled, making a play at kissing her again but reluctantly she refused him.

"My parents are gonna be here soon you goofball!" She said batting him off and admitting defeat he helped with the dinner that the couple were putting all they're hopes in, hoping everything would be just perfect. Arnold praying their families would see eye to eye and Helga praying her Dad would just behave himself!

"This is stupid!" Scoffed Bob, standing outside the boarding house with Miriam as she fussed with his suit.

"B! You promised Helga, you want to look good don't you?" She reminded him, dusting his shoulders.

"I don't need to prove myself to anyone, I'm the one that has to approve of them! It's my daughter I'm giving away!" He snorted.

"Bob! She's not a prize and we're not approving of anything. I know Helga and she would marry this boy whether we wanted her to or not, she just wants us to get to know the family she's marrying us into!" Soothed Miriam, trying to tame her husband's stubborn temper.

_What's she talking about? This Arnold kid asked Helga to marry him not the other way about and that means nothing goes ahead without my approval._

They made their way up the steps and knocked on the door making Helga and Arnold jump anxiously. They were welcomed in and the first introductions were made.

"Big Bob Pataki!" Announced Bob thrusting his hand at Phil who was not fazed by the large blustery man in the slightest, just slightly surprised that he hadn't realised that they had met many times before throughout their kids childhood. "Yeah, I know, the beeper king!" Joked Phil, shaking the pro-offered hand. "Phil", he added when he saw the look of waiting on Bob's face.

"Hi Phil!" Sighed Miriam already annoyed at her husband.

"Hi Miriam, nice to see you again!" Phil smiled, ignoring Bob's questioning glances.

"Mom! Where's Olga?" Questioned Helga as she appeared from the kitchen.

"Oh sweetie, I'm sorry but she and Ted couldn't make it, little Katie had a dance recital. They're really sorry they couldn't be here!"

Helga was surprised at just how disappointed she was; she just really wanted her whole family to be in attendance.

Arnold nervously appeared behind Helga eyeing Bob carefully who spotted him immediately, eyeing him back critically.

"Now where's that wife of mine? Pookie?" Called Phil

_Now how come Miriam knew this clown and I didn't? Well, I had better not let Helga know that, she'd kill me. I didn't know I was supposed to know the whole family already! What the heck was tonight for then? Well anyway, he looks like a kook but I guess I'm going to have to try and like him. Do I really want my little girl, a Pataki marrying into this? A dysfunctional family in a broken down boarding house? Is that his hand on her waist? I'll kill him! Ow! Miriam has pinched my arm, she must have seen it too, just shows how well she knows me!_

There was an audible gasp as Gertie appeared from the dining room clad in a very elaborate Japanese Kimono, her silvery hair bound tightly in a traditional Japanese hairstyle decorated with intricate ornaments. She glided over to Bob and Miriam, who looked positively flabbergasted, and bowed gracefully and said "Konichiwa!"

Arnold covered his face with his hands, cursing quietly. Helga barely containing her amusement by the whole thing, she thought Gertie looked absolutely beautiful and this kind of outburst was truly her and that's what she wanted her parents to see.

_What in the…? Is this some kind of prank? The old bird can't be serious!_

"Please, join us for dinner!" Gertie invited softly, gesturing towards the dining room.

Arnold laughed nervously confirming to the Pataki's that she was a little eccentric.

"…and perfectly harmless", joked Phil, enjoying the whole thing thoroughly.

Gertie had prepared a gorgeous Japanese style meal with flowers, beautiful china, the works. A veritable banquet was laid out on the table; Helga gasped at its impressiveness. She suddenly realised why Gertie hadn't let her or Arnold into this room during all preparations.

"Oh Gertie, it's just wonderful!" Gasped Miriam extremely flattered that the older woman had gone to such lengths to impress them. Arnold wasn't feeling so ashamed any more; in fact he felt the first traces of pride began to seep through.

Soon the two families were seated and the feast was underway, Gertie keeping the river of green tea ever flowing. Bob however had sat in complete disbelief at the whole situation, so far he hadn't said anything and usually this wasn't a good sign…

_Now I know I promised Helga that I would give this a shot but this was just out of the question! The family was obviously nuts, this just wasn't normal! Where's the meat and potatoes, I was only going to endure this when I thought I was getting a free meal but what did I get? Was that raw fish? God, they're not only nuts but they're savages! And rice? This wasn't a family it was some kind of cult! That's it, Helga is not marrying this psycho!_

_Of course, she does look happy, so does Miriam for that matter. She seems to be enjoying this whole affair._

"This is really something, isn't it B?" Smiled Miriam.

"Oh yeah, it's something alright", he began "Something awful!" He picked up a piece of sushi and looked at with an up-turned nose before tossing it down with disgust!

"Dad!" Cried Helga in shock, she thought he was going to try.

"I thought you were meant to be impressing us, Phil!" The man continued "Where's the decent food? And another thing, about this kid of yours, Albert is it?"

"Oh God!" Squeaked Helga, hiding behind her hand.

"What exactly are his intentions with my daughter? She's a Pataki and Pataki's don't marry losers, you know!"

Phil and Gertie just listened stunned, not entirely sure they were hearing this. They had never heard anyone be so blatantly rude and insensitive. Phil felt his anger replace his shock and he stood up suddenly, slamming his fists on the table. "My grandson's name is Arnold you Moron and how a wonderful girl like Helga came from the same gene pool as you I'll never understand!"

_Excuse me? Oh this old coot had guts, how dare he say that to me! Bob Pataki!_

"Well whatever the kids name is my daughter isn't marrying into a nut house like this! I won't allow it!" He bellowed back, also standing up, ignoring his wife's pleas to get a hold of himself. Gertie just looked down sadly, her serene disposition rarely invaded by rage.

They continued to argue like this causing all out chaos to break loose, Helga listening to every word as it stung her heart. He just didn't care; he simply did not care how much this hurt her. What a fool she'd been to think he could have changed, to think he could think of someone else instead of himself for a change. Her anger bubbled as it reached its boiling point; he can insult her all he likes but not Arnold and his sweet, loving family! That she would not stand for!

She stood up and at the top of her lungs screamed…

"ENOUGH! Both of you just stop! Bob, I asked of you one thing, one tiny little thing. To just think about someone else besides yourself for one night and you couldn't even do that. Well, I have news for you, I love Arnold, with all my heart and there's isn't a thing you can do to stop me from marrying him and I will whether you have a part in it or not!"

_Was she serious? Was she actually going to defy me? When I saw the icy hatred of me in her eyes, well, it was confirmation enough, it hit home then. What I had done tonight was irreversible and unforgivable. Why can't I control myself, oh God this hurts the glare the pure and utter hatred coming from her. It's unbearable. These are good people, they had busted their butts to impress me and I had thrown it in their faces. I truly am a moron. Why did I do it? Why…because I love her. I love her so much, she's my little girl and the thought of giving her up to someone else makes me furious. Is it possible that everything I do is all out of love? I'm not sure, all I know now is that I have to fix it, the problem is will she ever give me a second chance?_


	8. bridezilla pt ii

The rise of Bridezilla!

a/n: I don't know if any of you watch the bridezilla and too many of you who are not familiar with the word or show here is the definition: (usually humorous) A woman who, in the course of planning her wedding, exercises or attempts to exercise a high degree of control over all or many minor details of the ceremony and reception, so I thought about writing this for a long time because who couldn't make a bridezilla than our very own Helga? Well you try having big bob bitching about the finances of the wedding and believe me in this both Bob and Helga come to a head, and having Miriam falling down drunk on the dance floor, and Olga getting under your skin.

Disclaimer: I do not own Arnold!

Chapter 7

The rise of Bridezilla!

a/n: I don't know if any of you watch the bridezilla and too many of you who are not familiar with the word or show here is the definition: (usually humorous) A woman who, in the course of planning her wedding, exercises or attempts to exercise a high degree of control over all or many minor details of the ceremony and reception, so I thought about writing this for a long time because who couldn't make a bridezilla than our very own Helga? Well you try having big bob bitching about the finances of the wedding and believe me in this both Bob and Helga come to a head, and having Miriam falling down drunk on the dance floor, and Olga getting under your skin.

Disclaimer: I do not own Arnold!

Chapter

Helga awoke feeling bright, refreshed and extraordinarily happy. She was due to get married to the most wonderful man on the planet and things between her and her father could not be better. She felt on top of the world when she finally emerged from the bedroom, prepared to face the day and its challenge's head on.

As she turned into the kitchen she saw the man in question waiting for her, cup of coffee at the ready.

"Mornin' sunshine!" He greeted cheerily, handing her the cup of warm bitter liquid. She grinned at him mischievously, accepting the cup and quickly discarding it in order to snake her arms around her fiancé's neck, to which there was very little protest but rather was countered with him tucking his own arms around her slender waist.

"You know what? I had the weirdest dream last night…" she began, leaning her forehead on Arnold's.

"Oh yeah?" He replied, amused.

"Mmm, I dreamt that I was engaged to a sexy blond!"

"Hey what a coincidence, me too!" He countered dropping his lips on hers, her giggles becoming muffled. She pulled herself closer to him, deepening the kiss and letting her hands glide slowly away from her loves neck and towards an area much lower down. Arnold gasped in amused surprise upon realisation of where Helga was heading.

"Whoa", he laughed, breaking the kiss and kidnapping her roving hands "Awful frisky this morning aren't we?"

She grinned at him deviously and bit her bottom lip coyly "Are you arguing?" She whispered, attempting to free her hands, they had better things to do.

"Usually…" he broke off to plant a little kiss on her neck "never, but on this particular occasion I have a surprise for you!" He gestured for her to stay put as he darted away to a nearby closet.

Helga's eyes lit up in confusion and delight "Oh yeah? I like surprises".

Arnold producing a large, beautifully wrapped box grinned at her excitedly as he ran over to deposit the gift.

"Arnold! Are you serious?" Squeaked Helga, surprised "What's this for?"

"Well, the only reason I can think of is because I love you"

The blonde woman grinned widely at her love, feeling like the luckiest girl in the world, she was so unbelievably lucky to have Arnold in her life. She caressed his cheek lovingly and laughed in amazement "I love you so much, you nut!"

"Open it, open it!" He pleaded in excitement.

Not wanting to wait any longer Helga tore the brightly coloured paper from the box and discarded the lid to reveal a shiny, white plastic object. Her sunny expression suddenly became overcast…

"A blender…you got me a blender", she stated with feigned enthusiasm

"Yeah! You like?" Smiled the man, pulling the appliance from the box and holding up for all to view "I thought it would be great in our new place – you know – for when we're married"

Helga stood up slowly and busied herself with cleaning away the wrapping paper – trying desperately to take her focus away from the awful flashbacks she was having of seeing her mother in the kitchen, blending smoothies, every night of her childhood. The bored, dead expression on her mothers face coming back to haunt her.

"Helga?" Arnold eyed her quizzically "What's wrong, don't you like it?"

"It's…um…certainly not what I expected"

"I thought it would be a good start to the first of many appliances for our first house!" He smiled, tapping the machine lightly.

"So…is that the way you think it's gonna be? You're the breadwinner and I'm going to stay home blending things, eagerly awaiting your return to the castle!" Helga hissed – turning on him suddenly – startling him beyond belief. This was certainly not what he expected.

"No, honey, that's not what…" began the bewildered man only to be cut short by his rapidly raging fiancée.

"Because believe me Buster, just because your gaining a wife does not mean your getting a mindless slave into the bargain!" She cried, becoming more hysterical by the minute the more she remembered her mother and the alcohol that found it's way into the smoothie recipe.

Arnold gaped, wide-eyed and completely aghast. What had come over her? How could she have so grossly misinterpreted this tiny token of his affections. It wasn't meant to mean anything other than that soon they would be starting a whole new life together.

Helga was beginning to rant on her own rather than having a two-way argument, her eyes glazing over with threatening tears. She paced the room frantically, pressing her hand against her forehead as though that would push out the images of Miriam; she was like a caged animal.

Arnold's shock was soon replaced with concern as he realised that there was a deeper meaning behind all this – the blender had just touched on a nerve, it had been a trigger that set off something from her emotionally broken past.

"I don't even like smoothies!" She screeched suddenly, her voice cracking as emotion threatened to take over.

"Helga, I…" Arnold moved to calm her but she darted away and towards the door.

"You know what – I need…I need to go. I need some time to think, I'm not sure this marriage is such a good idea!" She squeaked, tears beginning to roll down her cheeks.

"What!" Whispered Arnold – now very distraught. He moved to grab her but she was already igniting the ignition in her car and making her get away.

"Shit!" Cursed the stunned man – slumping against the doorframe.

"So I said I didn't think getting married was a good idea anymore and left". Helga's breathing was stilted as she tried to refresh her tired lungs. She sniffed loudly and dabbed her red-raw eyes with a tear soaked bedsheet.

Sheesh

thought Bob, as he sat at the end of the bed, not sure how to deal with the situation that Miriam insisted he handle All this trauma over a blender, she's always been so emotional. Look at her, she's completely broken by this. She doesn't want to call off this wedding one little bit; she loves that weird headed kid too much. No wonder she's so distraught – she's just scared, it's all too overwhelming for a little girl to take I guess the blender thing just pushed her over the edge. Although – the evil side of me is quite pleased at the idea that I don't have to give my little girl away after all. Besides, she's clearly not ready to get married. Bob tried vainly to justify then schemes of the devil on his shoulder.

Helga suddenly sat up, dragging Bob's thoughts back to reality, she looked at him, her blue eyes over flowing with pain.

Oh man, look at her, she's in agony over this. Maybe this Arnold kid isn't that bad after all if she's so afraid of losing him.

She leaned in and hugged him tightly in desperation, knocking Bob's thoughts off track for a second in surprise. Whoa, this is new; she's actually looking to me for comfort…of her own free will!

The large, stiff man suddenly relaxed and welcomed the warm sensation of having his youngest daughter reach out and need him. Something inside him ached suddenly, he wanted more moments like this and as long as the girl holding onto him was married and gone she wouldn't need him like this anymore. He was about to say something along the lines of calling off the wedding just for while when a frantic knocking at the door interrupted his thoughts. He inwardly cursed when he heard his own wife greet a very frightened Arnold.

"Wait here!" Ordered Bob, squeezing her shoulders gently as he made his way to rid his life of the pesky Arnold.

He met him halfway in the hallway and was about to give him a mouthful…

"Listen Kid…" but he was stopped short when the young blond man looked up at him. His eyes brimmed red and puffy from an obvious torrent of tears – his green eyes mirrored the same agony that he had seen in his daughters. For the first time in his life, Bob's heart twisted.

"Mr Pataki…I love her! I love her so much it hurts!" He whispered, his voice torn.

Shit!

Thought the blowhard man, his wall crumbled I was so close!

"Helga! C'mon, get up!" The older man bellowed.

Surprised by Bob's sudden demanding tone, the girl in question turned to look at him quizzically and was met with a pair of emerald eyes shining on her, desperately looking for forgiveness.

"Don't give me any of this no wedding nonsense! Everyone knows that wild dogs couldn't keep you two from tying the knot – now enough of this and get over there a kiss her!" Scolded Bob, nudging the young man into the room.

Helga blinked in disbelief for a moment before a wave of giggles washed over her. Grinning, Arnold felt a relief so strong it made him dizzy.

Once again Bob's simple, hard-ass logic had saved the day and the two young lovers kissed deeply in reconciliation.

Criminey!

Bob thought, rolling his eyes in disgust!


	9. shower

A/n: hello every here I am back with another chapter; you will never believe how people go out of their way to have all these wedding parties.

Disclaimer: I don't own Hey Arnold.

"Hard to believe, in just under a month…" Olga's voice trailed off as she hugged her baby sister, Helga. The females of the Pataki family – sisters Olga, Helga and they're mother Miriam– were preparing for Helga's bridal shower.

With the wedding two days away, they now spent much time suppressing with Extra pre-wedding attention aside, I felt perfectly at ease lounging in Rhonda's oversized living room. It was her idea actually, so naturally….

To throw the bridal shower of the century at her penthouse, The shower was scheduled for 2:00, and guest would be arriving soon, she promised Helga that "there will be no horrible cutesy games, no little mints in baskets as party favors, and I swear to God that we will not force you to wear a dress made of toilet paper." Either way, Helga was having quite a bit of fun, with her mother, Rhonda, Phoebe, and a couple of old friends in attendance.

Phoebe poked her head out of the conference room. "Helga, we're ready for you," she said with a grin, her excitement evident.

"Coming!" Helga called. She looked to the main entrance one last time before heading into the conference room.

"That's from Gerald, and me," Phoebe pointed at the gift Helga was examining.

She tore open the wrapping paper. "A mini fridge! I would never have guessed. Thank you Phoebes," Helga smiled graciously.

Pulling back the tissue paper Helga took one last look at the circle of grinning women. To her it seemed most of the bridal shower's guests had all conspired together to make her blush. Each gift had consisted of a piece of lingerie or something along those lines.

Her first gift was a bottle of Paris Hilton signature perfume. After that, she received: books, money, makeup, kitchen appliances, and some unidentifiable items that she wasn't sure she even wanted to know about.

But, considering whom this gift was from, she expected this one to be a little more sedate.

She was wrong.

Her cheeks flamed as the bride-to-be stared at the present in her lap.

"Rhonda!"

Holding up the fuzzy his & hers handcuffs, Megan stared at the smirking blonde with an incredulous look on her face. "You've *got* to be kidding!"

At this the rest of the women burst into laughter.

"This is from me," Sheena said blandly as she handed Helga her pristinely wrapped gift.

"It's a…bible?" Helga looked curiously and thank you to everyone, this was a wonderful shower." "I've highlighted some passages you may want to look at with Arnold…though it might be too late," she raised a suspicious eyebrow.

Helga forced a smile. "Well, thank you, Sheena. It's the thought that counts. And thank you to everyone, this was a wonderful shower." She glanced at her watch, which read 2:50.

"To the bride to be!" echoed the group, and they chugged down even more champagne and giggled some more. Phoebe smiled and said, "So, Helga, any ideas on the honeymoon yet?", and burst out giggling again

"I've seen Arnold, and don't tell Gerald this, although I swear I love him and would never do anything to hurt him, that fiancé of yours kind of stirs the imagination

"I do, Phoebe," Helga replied, smiling. "Although, it had better just be your imagination. I don't want to have to kill the love of my best friend's life," she finished jokingly.

"Well, if you need any wardrobe help, God knows we've given you enough lingerie to cover about seven years of lovemaking," Phoebe responded, laughing. A blush crept over Helga cheeks as she recalled some of the racy pieces she had been given by the ladies. Shockingly enough, some of the raciest had come from her own mother. Helga shook her head at the thought of her prim, proper mother being in any store that would sell crotch less panties.

Helga arrived home to the fourth floor still slightly buzzed. She wasn't drunk, per se, but she was definitely feeling relaxed. She walked in, and found Arnold in the same spot she always did, at his worktable. "God, he looks so sexy when he's concentrating like that," she thought to herself. He smiled as she came nearer, and looked up. "So, I take it the shower went well?" he asked, trying not to be distracted by the obvious scent of her arousal. She looked down at him with hooded eyelids, and said "Very much so. In fact, the girls were nice enough to remind me what a hottie I am marrying." She strode away, knowing that remark would inflame Henry's senses. He followed after her, and said, "Oh? What did you tell them?"

"Well, I told them that if they even dream it, I'm going to have to kill them," she replied, knowing that he got turned on whenever she got territorial. He grinned, and said, "Don't worry, I don't want you to go to jail. Besides, I've got everything I need right here." He reached for her, but she pulled away. She was feeling playful and wanted to tease him. He furrowed his brow, confused. He knew she wanted him, so why be so coy? He saw the glint in her eyes, and it began to make sense. He decided to play as though he had no idea what was going on. "Did you receive any good presents?" he asked casually.

"Well, maybe a couple," she replied. "I am feeling really beat, honey. I think that I am just going to change for bed." With that she started to walk towards the bedroom, pulling off her clothes. Arnold stopped dead when he saw what had been underneath. He knew that she had worn basic cotton set when she had left, and now she was wearing a red lace demi-cup bra that barely held her breasts. A lacy red thong accompanied this. He growled softly, and Helga turned innocently to him. "What's wrong, Henry? It's not like I've never gotten ready for bed before."

He was in front of her in the blink of an eye. "Helga. You. Are. Teasing. Me."

"Whatever do you mean?" she replied. "It isn't like you've never seen me in underwear."

"That is not the underwear you were wearing before you left. And I can smell you. You are teasing me. And you know it."

"Well…" she replied, knowing the game was up, "Maybe I am. What are you going to do about it, hair boy?"

He grabbed her and carried her to the bedroom over his shoulder. Feeling very wicked, Helga lightly slapped his ass from her location. He growled louder, and said, "Unless you want a spanking of your own, I'd suggest you behave yourself." He dropped her onto the bed, and began to rummage through his drawers. He came out, grinning, with a pair of fuzzy handcuffs. Helga looked at them and began to giggle, saying, "Where did you get those?"

"From Sid. He said that you'd be getting lots of fun gifts, I should too," he replied. He grabbed her wrist, and put one cuff around it. He took advantage of her slightly drunken state and cuffed her wrists to their bed. Taking note of the fact that the cuffs were red, he smirked and said, "A matching set, huh, Helga?"

"Hmmm… naughty boy," she responded. She began to writhe on the bed, to tease him some more. He sighed and said, "Still being a tease, are we? I don't think you've learned your lesson yet. Looks like I have to work harder."

"You can get as hard as you want," she replied, still laughing lightly. He merely smiled, like the cat who swallowed the canary, and began to strip his clothing off. He went down to his boxers and straddled her on the bed. He kissed her deeply, and she kissed back. He stopped, and looked at Helga in such a way that she knew the game was on.

"Well, Helga, you've had a shower of gifts tonight. Maybe it's time that you had a shower of kisses."

Helga thought to him, " Kisses? Just kisses? That is your idea of punishment?"

"Of course, I didn't say that those would be just kisses from the mouth," he replied, staring at her face as he reached into the drawer again. "How would your skin like some kisses from this feather tickler?" he asked as he held a plastic stick with brightly colored feathers just above her neck.

Helga shuddered, remembering how devastating it had been when he had teased her that way at Christmas. He smirked, and said, "Going to apologize for being a tease?"

"No," she replied evenly. He sighed dramatically, and said, "Well, then I have no choice but to begin your torture." He slid the feathers slowly down her neck, enjoying her reactions. She squeezed her eyes shut and tried to pretend they weren't affecting her, but soon she had to giggle and moan, especially when he teased her by stroking one ear with it, then attacking the other one when she moved her head. He ran the tickler down her chest, and teased relentlessly with it just outside the lace of her bra. He smiled at her and said, "It looks like your nipples are standing at attention. Are they lonely for the tease of my tickler,Helga?"

"Don't you dare, you bastard," she growled out.

"Going to apologize?" he asked, eyebrow raised. After all, he knew that she wouldn't apologize until she no longer wanted to play.

"Not. A. Chance." she replied.

"Then maybe they should become acquainted, hmm?" he replied, and undid the front clasp of the bra. He ran the feather tickler over her breasts, enjoying Helga's loud moans. He quite frankly felt as though he was teasing himself as much as her, but he knew that she was in a playful mood tonight and wanted to please. He stopped after a few moments, and said, "Well? What about now? Or must I devise a new torture to use on you?"

"No. . And you just remember, one of these nights I may have you at my mercy again."

"Duly noted," he replied. He walked out of the bedroom, both to heighten her anticipation and to retrieve an item. He came back with a small plastic bear with honey in it. He grinned at her, and said, "I'm in the mood for something sweet. How about you, love?"

"Ohh…" Helga replied, realizing what her new "torture" was going to be. He smirked that sexy smirk again, and dribbled honey over her nipples and stomach. He bent down, and slowly licked the honey off. He started again, only this time with her neck. She cried out as his tongue worked her neck over. She had never realized what an erogenous zone her neck could be until she had met him, and he used this move to his advantage. He pulled back, and said, "I'll kiss you where you want it most. I'll lick the sweet honey from you. Just say the words, and I'll make it so."

Helga knew she couldn't resist any more. They both were burning from desire. She said, "All right,Arnold. I'm sorry I teased you. Please pleasure me."

"The pleasure is all mine, " he growled, and removed her panties from her. He dipped his tongue in he essence, sucking slowly, languidly at first, then increased the pressure as she cried out. When he could sense her climax as imminent, he ripped his boxer off her and entered her in one swift thrust, and she raised her hips to meet him time and again. Their climaxes came together, and Arnold quickly bit down on Helga's neck, causing her to have another orgasm almost on top of the first one. He reached up and undid the cuffs, and Helga, panting, slapped him playfully on the chest as they calmed down.

"Well, I'd say the preview went well," Helga grinned, looking at a slightly stunned Arnold. "Trust me, if you had that reaction, you're gonna love the movie."

"I believe I will," he replied. "Was I too hard on you, love?"

"Well, I'd say you were just hard enough on me," she replied as she stroked him beneath the covers, causing him to twitch in her hand. He lifted her hand, and said, "Already teasing me more, love?"

"Hmm… I may be a bad student," Helareplied. "You may have to teach me again and again and again."

"For the rest of our lives," he replied, pouncing on her as she laughed. As they kissed, she thought to him, "Hmm, honey and a feather tickler. Just two more things I've gotta add to the vengeance list of things I need to use on you on the honeymoon."

"Looking forward to it, love," he thought back. Soon, their passion carried them away and there was no room for coherent thought for either.


	10. night before

It was after the rehearsal Miles and Stella all treated the wedding party dinner to Bobby Flays restaurant it was the eve of their wedding and after they got back from the rehearsal dinner, Helga had sent Arnold off with Gerald.

After she got Phoebe and Vanessa settled on the sofa bed, she went off

She knew exactly where it was.

Of course she only took it out when she was sure nobody would see. Nobody could know. The contents of that box had to stay pristine, perfect. Untouched and un-tarnished by anything else in her life.

They were from the best times of her life.

Just as the first rays of the sun boldly shined through her window, she gently pulled the wooden box from under stacks of other mementos. Her fingers slowly ran over the surface of the box. If she closed her eyes she could still pretend it was then. That she was just waiting for him to come.

That he could come would come. All she had to do was wait.

But that sensation soon vanished and was replaced with the familiar feeling of dread accompanied by the knowledge that he would never come back. She opened her eyes again, and

Her hand softly pressed on the clamp so that it slid open. She swung the wooden lid on old hinges until it hung limply from the back.

Helga smiled at the contents of the box, contents she had memorized a lifetime ago, and Helga lifted the first item in the box her locket opening it and reading the inscription

'_Arnold my soul you are always in my heart, Love, Helga G Pataki" _

To this day Arnold still does not know about this, and the red shoes, her Arnold like figure made out of eraser, the little pink book, diaries etc. that are full poems of him, she let him keep the other one, the trophy that they won for the sand castle building, the Christmas list where she gave up her boots where she realized in loving someone you have to put their happiness before yours, and then there was the pink bow for Helga it was a reminder of how she and Arnold first met. And she wouldn't mind making it an heirloom their daughter would inherit it just like their son would inherit Arnold's blue hat.

a/n my only thoughts on Helga and this is discussion on this chapter everybody's opinion is welcomed, it was on Don's Hey Arnold site where he commented on Helga's locket where she had the opportunity to come out and confront Arnold she did but she couldn't and to the episode married it's possible that overheard Helga's "moment" I'm just theorizing here people!


	11. big day

A/N: thank you for the reviews they mean so much,

The Big Day

The February day dawned bright and clear day of winter filled with promise Helga Pataki rose with the sun, not because it was bright, and not because she longed to see the sunrise, but because she was to be married that day. She sighed in happiness as she leaned against the window and watched the sun rise over the sleepy city of New York; Helga rolled over in her all too familiar bed. Just as the sun was shining threw the window.

Today was Helga's wedding day; it is the day that she has been looking forward to since she was 3 yrs old. The day where she would finally give her heart to one man and on man only she's ever loved, Helga was just happy that everything was finally right with the world. And now, she was at a turning point in her life—at the threshold of giving over her life, her whole being, to the man that she loved, and promising to love him no matter what life threw at them.

The happiest day of her life, well that's what everyone kept saying to her, why to her did it seem like the saddest and worst day of her life? Nothing was right, apart from whom she had for bridesmaids. She had to have those though (the only other person she could have asked was in prison and would never wear a dress in front of others).

She was not nervous, per se. No, she was a pack of nitro glycerin ready to explode at the slightest jostle. If anything went wrong, then she'd be likely to have a mental breakdown. She spent months preparing for this day. She spent hours pouring over magazines. She spent countless minutes on the phone with the caterers and florists and God knows whom else.

She planned this day perfectly down to the tiniest detail and it had to go right. It had to. She didn't want to think of what would happen.

"Good Morning."

"Morning Phoebes."

" Well I am off, I am going to run errands I am going to the store for a little while. I need to make some calls and do some paperwork. Do you want me to come back and pick you up before the wedding or do you just want to meet me there?"

"I will just meet you there. I have some things I need to do before the wedding too. Thanks though. "Your welcome, I will see you at the church." It had all come down to this


	12. the ceremony

The Ceremony

" Fine, go out there with a flat veil, see if I care. At least have some respect for the late Vera Wang who designed this breathtaking creation of vintage wonderment!" Rhonda's lilac colored dress swished noisily as she sat down with a huff

Girls, please! This is supposed to be the happiest of Helga's life, the very pinnacle of joy and anticipation! Bickering will only take from the day's special significance, don't you agree?" Phoebe Hyerdahl-Johannsen frowned bitterly. She always wanted every thing to go as according to plan, and Helga's wedding was no different.

"This is it." Helga thought as she was adjusting her veil on top of her head by the end of the day she would be Helga Shortman

Helga sat at the vanity inside the small dressing room provided for her and her bridesmaids. There was a knock on the half opened door and Phoebe quickly stood in front of Helga to hide her and her clothing from whoever it may be at the door. Everyone relaxed

Helga took one last look at herself in the three-way mirror. Her pale blonde hair was swept up in dramatic curls. Her long white dress was simple but elegant,

Hey hey hey, little lady. You clean up pretty good, there," Big Bob's voice boomed in the tiny bridal room.

Helga blushed. " DAAAD!"

" What? I was just paying you one of those compliment things," Bob smiled widely at her embarrassment. " You ready for this?

Are you kidding? I've been ready forever, it feels like," Arnold whispered to his Grandfather, the old codger teasing him as usual.

" And you're sure you haven't already consummated anything yet? Didn't take any free samples? Didn't play grabby hands in the-"

" NO! I mean, no, Grandpa. It's been difficult of course, but we promised each other it would be much more special this way, like it was for my mom and dad," Arnold smiled slyly.

" I still don't know how you found those missing journal pages, you little minx," Grandpa narrowed his ancient blue eyes. " At least you were 23 before you found 'em,"

Arnold breathed a heavy sigh as he straightened his bow tie for the fourth time of the morning. He brushed his suit off and looked down to see his socked feet.

"Hey, looks like you're forgetting something buddy." Arnold turned to see Gerald standing there holding a pair of clack Converse.

"I can't wear those for my wedding!" Arnold replied holding back a chuckle.

"You have to!" Gerald said handing them to Arnold. He smiled and sat down on a nearby chair. He inspected the tattered soles that had seen so many moments of his life.

His dance with his mother and grandmother, his cousin Arnie and some old friends had flown to New York

" ARNOLD!" Gerald spoke loudly, desperately trying to get his friend's attention. " Are you with me, buddy?"

" Huh? Oh yeah. What were you saying?" Arnold shook his oblong head in an attempt to clear the cobwebs.

" I was saying that we need to get that tie fixed before Harold here eats the waxed fruit in the rectory. That boy is STILL insatiable," Gerald muttered, grasping Arnold's tie between his fingers and expertly forming a perfectly crisp black bow.

" I can't help it. I have low blood sugar," Harold moaned, his bulging eyes fixating on the aforementioned waxen fruit. " You could have shared your Mr. Fudgy bar, Peterson!"

" Ah done toll' you before, Harold. My sweet darling' bought that special, just in case ah got hungry 'afore the ceremony. So just back off," The towering hick of a man lifted his rather large nose in the air.

" Cool out, you two. Our boy here's got a case of the wedding day jitters," Gerald ribbed him in his side good-naturedly. " Why else would you be staring off into space like that?"

"I'm not really that nervous," Arnold lied. His pulse raced at the words falling from his own lips. " Really. Thanks for the concern, though," He ran a hand through his golden mop of hair, quickly untaming it in the process.

Gerald laughed loudly. " Yeah, that's why I can see your heart beating right through your tux, huh? Don't worry about it, buddy! You remember how I felt when my big day was here,"

" I know," Arnold murmured, his palms sweating in anticipation. " I just never thought this day would come, or that I would really be marrying.

She had been there all his life. I hadn't. She watched him grow up from that small child, I saw him as he reached adulthood. She stole him from me. He was supposed to love _me_. That special sparkle in his eyes…that warm smile…. they were _mine_. But I couldn't hate her…. he loved her.

Arnold exhaled deeply. "God, this is nerve wrecking," he whispered to Gerald who was standing next to him. He tapped his foot on the floor nervously as he kept rubbing his hands together.

"Don't worry, man. Just keep cool," Gerald whispered back as they watched the last few people take their seats in the altar. It was embellished with lilies at the ends of each row of seats. There were candles surrounding as well with an assortment of colorful flowers set up nicely in the front of the altar where Arnold, Gerald, and the minister stood.

Standing with them were Harold, Sid, Stinky, Eugene, Helga's brother-in law Dean holding Wyatt and Ernie all in their navy blue tuxedo with pink and hydrangea

In front rows, there was Miles, Stella Grandpa and Grandma and the boarders. Helga's family was sitting on the other side. Except for her father who was going to walk her down the aisle.

Arnold looked up at the ceiling and looked back down at his feet.

Gerald knew very well what he was feeling. Chills ran down his spine.

There were probably well over 100 people at their wedding. Suddenly the music played. Everyone turned around.

Down came the little flower girls Vanessa and Colby Olga's daughter throwing rose petals on the ground happily. Everyone awed at his or her cuteness. It was. First came Rhonda, Sheena, Nadine, Lila, and Olga Phoebe in their pink bride's maid dress, followed by two other women in back of her. Gerald's mouth went dry. Phoebe was truly radiant. She was practically floating to the front of the altar.

Helga and Bob appeared and everyone stood up. She was beautiful in her wedding dress and she held a bouquet of pink roses and white lilies in her right hand, and her left arm was linked with Bob's left arm. She had never felt so close to him in her whole life. She couldn't think of anything else but Arnold.

Big Bob let Helga go with a kiss on her forehead. She could have sworn that there were tears dwelling in his eyes.

Helga smiled gently at Arnold, and gave her bouquet to Phoebe.

Everyone sat down and watched Helga and Arnold at the front of the room. They were holding hands and staring lovingly at each other's eyes. Gerald stood there. Just watching Arnold and looked at Helga. He could see the happiness in her eyes. They reminded him of Phoebe's eyes when they got married. He glanced at Phoebe and saw glowiness in her eyes. She wasn't the kind to cry at weddings. But she was…inside she was tearing up. And outside, she was barely showing it.

Helga let out a big sigh of relief and Arnold took her in his arms and kissed her. The whole altar was filled with cheers and claps. Arnold and Helga ran out of the church holding hands.


	13. party time

A/n I have to say thank you for the reviews please keep them coming I enjoy reading especially yours Neptune they crack me up and to cherry thank you so much for your encouragement, Neptune I can tell you like reading dramatic and scandal like stories, so this chapter is blah, blah! It is party time excellent! Got to love Wayne's World.

Well thanks again

Xoxoxoxox

C.

Party Time

The ceremony was absolutely beautiful, with only a few small flubs on Arnold's part. They had written their own vows, and as Helga was an up and coming novelist and poet, hers were both eloquent and tender. Arnold's were less poetic, but very heartfelt and emotional. There was not a dry eye in the place when they were pronounced man and wife. A tender kiss sealed the deal

" Ladies and gentleman, May I introduce you to the couple of the hour, Mr. and Mrs.-"

As the bishop announced them man and wife Arnold lifts the veil over Helga's head and gently kisses her. After the kiss they both smile at each other and turn to walk down the aisle arm in arm with the wedding party following behind them.

They had the reception at the glass houses four seasons catered, b floral had provided the flowers it was pink roses, white lilies, orchids, tulips etc. the cake was four layered with pink a ribbon wrapped around the grooms cake was a football shaped, photos taken by 5 west studios it was a phenomenon

Then there was a chime of someone's glass when a song stopped. Everyone looked around and saw Gerald standing on the stage with a champagne glass in his hand and a fork in the other.

Arnold My best friend. I've been a friend with him since pre-school where it started with a cookie. And Jesus is I really writing a Best Man's speech for the person I love most on this earth for his wedding day? How fucking disturbed am I? Fuck. I better get nice and drunk at the rehearsal dinner. How am I going to take this? How can I possibly see his eyes light up as Helga made her way down the aisle, father by her side, in her beautiful hand sewn dress. His eyes full of love and wonder in a deep blue sky with singing melodies and laughter and tears never leaving the sight of his bride. Eyes that have seen his friend die continuously and see right through me, as if it can read my mind, my weakness. Surely my heart will sink to the very depths of the sea, never to be found again. Frozen in a harsh ice land.

"Being the best man, I'd like to say a few words," said Gerald nobly. He looked at Helga and Arnold and grinned. "To Arnold and Helga…marriage is a very special thing between two people.

Special t"

Value those precious times you share together, they're too priceless to forget or to overlook. I know that this love you two share is really strong. Really. Hell, Arnold dumped Lila for this woman! Lila, the prom queen…Lila the one everyone _except _Arnold loves. Yeah, he wasted too many years on that woman. Now he has to make them up with Helga tonight." Everyone chuckled. "Him leaving Lila at the alter was really the gutsiest, the craziest, and the smartest thing he has ever done. Well, the smartest thing would actually be accepting the position of being a doctor,

Then everyone pushed Phoebe up on stage. She held her champagne glass and bit her lower lip.

"He, um, unlike Gerald, I'm not very good at speaking in front of crowds," Phoebe admitted. She drew in a deep breath. "But for this special occasion I will certainly make an effort." She looked up for a second. "Sorry, I didn't have anything planned out to say."

Then she looked at Helga. "Helga, my dear friend – I remember way back when we were nine and how you would always torment and tease Arnold every single day. Who ever knew that it wasn't because you hated him, but on the contrary, _loved_ him? It certainly took me by surprise," she smiled.

"After all these years of heartbreak and love, I am certain that the two of you are able to overcome and obstacle life puts in front of you. Take it from me, someone who has lost at an obstacle, you both have the passion, the love, and the fire to last forever. Right? Till death do you part? I only wish I had those virtues in my last marriage – if I did, I would still be very happy right now."

She raised her glass. "To the bride and groom!" but that's another story…

All of a sudden her water broke and Gerald had to go bring the car around Helga along with the other girls helped her in and they were off to the hospital to where Arnold and Helga would come visit the next morning right now they were focusing on each other so went on dancing

" Everyone repeated her and sipped their champagne. Gerald let out a dry sigh. He uncomfortably fidgeted in his seat. Phoebe walked down to her seat, not even looking at Gerald. While he was watching her ever step, her every move as until she sat down in her seat. There was a sharp pain in his chest and he looked away

.

Meanwhile Rhonda was bitching about how Patty stole Harold from her and how she has to put up with Thaddeus who not only crashed three she. her weddings to where Helga was her maid of honor three times, wedding one of them he jumped out of a plane and has purchased the next door to her in Beverly Hills.

Miriam was falling down drunk on the dance floor with a long island ice tea; Big Bob brought his play toy Gayle. But Helga wasn't going to let that ruin her day, since she has long time ago stopped trying to impress them.

So bouquet was tossed and it was Eugene who caught it and than they were of to St Lucia.


	14. honeymoon

Honeymoon

"I'm going to get out of this dress," Helga hums in my ear before pushing me onto the couch cushion with a bounce, "I don't want you to do anything until I return."

"Can't I watch?" I tease and openly stare at her cleavage, making no effort to hide my desire.

Helga releases a sexy chuckle, "No, but if you're good," she dips her head to kiss the corner of my mouth, then moves to my ear, "I'll let you touch."

Helga and Arnold were honeymooning in a five star hotel in St Lucia. After they had checked in, and got their room key, they decided to ask the porter to take their luggage up to their room, while they went to a local restaurant. Arnold thrust a couple of freshly exchanged dollars into the chap's outstretched hand.

He turned around and scooped his wife into a big, loving, hug took her hand, then waltzed out the doors separating them from the world outside and the world inside, and quite frankly he'd rather spend this fantastic day outside, rather than spending it in a hotel room, discovering nasty surprises here and there, like he had done in the past, and so the couple walked out hand in hand, snuggling up to each other.

Arnold carried the Styrofoam cooler to a private beach umbrella and set it down next to the blonde haired woman. Before plopping down on the blanket next to her. "Helga, you look have sexy in that bikini that I bought you.

" Arnold grabbed her and pulled her on top of him!" he growled kissing her. Grabbed his face with both hands and kissed him back repeatedly. She took of her bra exposing her bare back.

Helga eventually rolled off him wrapping the blanket around her chest and lay beside him resting her head on his shoulder. She was sure to lie on his left side leaving his right arm free and resting on the folded towel that concealed. She lay there and carefully

"Helga, you're not going to get a tan hiding under this umbrella all day."

"I don't tan! I burn, peel and blister but I don't tan. And I don't want to spend all night rubbing lotion all over my skin. I'd rather rub you all over it." She looked out to sea. "When the sun gets low I might do a little swimming but until then I'm staying right here in the shade."

Out on the sparkling blue sea Helga saw a beautiful ship leaving the harbor and heading out to sea. Cruise ships were very common out here in the Caribbean but they rarely if ever visited these waters. This ship was much smaller, sleeker and deadlier than any cruise ship. She could make out the sharp angular hull and boxy superstructure of a Ticonderoga class guided missile cruiser. She could just make out the number 60 painted on her bow and it was as if a switch clicked in her brain.

Arnold was also watching the cruiser, just enjoying the day and the feel of Helga's body pressed against his. She was clinging to him as if she was afraid he would disappear if she ever let go. Not too unreasonable considering how many times he did disappear from her life. He pulled her in tighter.

"Arnold, I want kids."

"Are you sure? Did you think about this?"

"You mean did I think about you're work and you being gone all the time and my high my job?

Arnold smiled. "I can see you've already made up your mind."

"I made up my mind the day you proposed. I've made a lot of sacrifices for you but not this! This is where I draw the line!"

"So how many do you want?"

"As many as we end up with. It won't be too many. The expiration date on my ovaries will come up soon enough."

"Well, I guess we have another problem. Last night you took every last one of my sperm cells. I'm afraid I don't have any left."

She punched his chest in mock indignation. "You'd better make more! And by tonight! Besides they're not your sperm cells anymore. From now on every last one of those little buggers belongs to me to do with whatever I want."

"My, you're a greedy little bitch."

"Damned right I am! I'll give you some time. We'll have a nice candlelit dinner and short walk on the beach." They knew they couldn't walk too far on this beach without running into the chain link, razor wire, and it was rumored land mines.

"I might have you tonight but tomorrow you'll be with another man!"

"Who? Eduardo?"

"Yeah! I'd like to have a little chat with Mr. Eduardo!"

"No! You said I can have him! You wouldn't even know what to say to him. Besides, I think he likes me."

don't get anything."

"What do you bet?"

Arnold thought a while. "If you get some actionable information out of Eduardo tomorrow I promise to do whatever you want tomorrow night without question."

Helga lay her head on his stomach and grinned up at him. "Are you sure? You don't know what kind of perversions I can come up with."

"I'll take my chances. If you don't get actionable information then you have to do whatever I want!"

"OK Arnold, you've got a bet!"

Helga squealed as Arnold pulled her up and sealed the bet with a kiss. Then he just let her lay on top of him. After a few minutes they heard a trumpet fanfare blare over the base warning them of what was about to happen. Everyone on the beach stopped what they were doing and turned to face the direction the sound came from. Helga got off Arnold and the two of them stood at attention as the Star Spangled Banner was played for evening colors. After the conclusion of the ceremony Helga ran to the surf to do a bit of swimming before dinner.

Arnold followed along behind her. He was glad he let Bill talk him into this. This place was great. Sun, sand, surf, the most desirable woman in the world.


End file.
